The Noise
by tragicpoet54
Summary: There’s a noise from the down the hall in the Castle That Never Was. And it won’t shut up.


Hello everyone! This is a little humorous piece that I wrote and posted on another site a while ago and somehow neglected to post it here. This actually got such good responses that it spanned a series that I'm still writing. It's an AU where the neophytes were created by the original six. Now, some people may not like it, but I call creative license and if you don't like, don't read it.

Title: The Noise

Rating: PG

Paring: Xemnas/Saix

Warnings: OC-ness.

Summary: There's a noise from the down the hall in the Castle That Never Was. And it won't shut up.

Not too long ago, The Castle That Never Was a quiet, almost creepy place where halls were empty and doors always closed. The six beings living there preferred solitude and spent most of their time alone. The only time they really saw each other was at occasional meetings called by the leader among them: Xemnas. Well, the members severely missed those times, with the exception of Xigbar. He enjoyed the new little additions. However, on the first night of the first calendar full moon, he was woken up by the strangest noise.

"ARROOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

He opened his eyes and listened again.

"AR—AR—AROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Throwing the covers back he grabbed his eye-patch and slowly made his way down the hall toward the source of the noise. It was coming from the room at the very end of the hall. This was one of the few rooms that had a window, and the room's occupant was crouched beside it, looking at Kingdom Hearts, the false moon, and howling.

"Saix! Saix, stop that!"

"AROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Saix was staring fixedly at the moon, his eyes glowing. Xigbar noticed that somehow, the baby that was hardly one year old had suddenly grown teeth. NO, on closer inspection, they were sharp, long, k-9's. Xigbar picked up the mongrol and tried burping him.

"AROOOO-CCC-OOOO!"

Didn't work. No matter what he did, Saix just kept on howling.

After five minutes, Xigbar was pacing with Saix in his arms, Xaldin poked his head into the room. "What is all this noise!?"

Xigbar strode over to Xaldin and held the baby out as if he were an annoying animal. "He won't shut up! 'E's been staring out the window, howling!"

Xaldin looked at Xigbar incredulously. "Did you try burping him?"

"Yes!"

"Talking to him?"

"YES!"

Xaldin looked pensive for a moment.

"Shoot him."

"WHAT! No! I'm not gonna shoot 'im!"

"Not fatally, imbecile, just once to get his attention."

"He's a baby! One shot could him 'im!"

"AROOOOOOOOO!"

"Eh…try levitating him then."

So Xigbar concentrated on Saix and floated him a few feet above their heads. But Saix just lied there, suspended in the air.

"AROOOOOOOOOOO!"

"Uhhng, make it stop!" said Xaldin, hands over his ears.

Knock Knock.

Lexaues and Zexion came in, both looking extremely tired and irritated.

"Oh good!" said Xigbar, face desperate. "Lexaeus, scare him!"

Lexaeus raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, growl at him and look terrifying!"

So Lexaeus bared his teeth and roared at Saix.

"GRRRRRRRR!"

That didn't seem to help at all. Now Saix was furious, growling and hissing at number V, spit spraying out of his mouth.

Zexion stepped forward and touched the boy's forehead, ignoring how he growled even more. "He's not hungry. Did you check his diaper?"

Xigbar flailed his arms. "YES! And burped him and floated him and tickled him! Nothing's working!"

When Zexion removed his hand, Saix began howling again.

"Well, at least he stopped hissing," said Lexaeus, wiping spit off of his face.

Soon, Vexen too entered, carrying what appeared to be a small box made of ice. Another baby, this one a blond female, was wailing at the top of her lungs while small electric currents emitted from her.

They all stared at him, allowing Saix to get back on the floor, eyes ablaze and fixated on Kingdom Hearts.

"I couldn't leave her there, making all this racket!" he said at their accusing looks. "And she kept trying to electricute me, so I had no other option!"

Xaldin shrugged and Xigbar just looked helpless. "You think an ice-box'll shut 'im up?" He pointed to Saix.

Vexen set Larxene on the floor, cause no one would be able to hold a freezing piece of ice, but when he tried to pick Saix up, Saix's hair stood on and end and his growling was even more dangerous than before.

While everyone was gathered round the window trying to think of a way to stop Saix howling, more cries were emitting from the hallway. Roxas was wailing as loud as he could. Demyx was making a weird puffing sound through his cries—like he couldn't get enough air or something. Luxord was wide awake and shaking the bars around his crib. Marluxia had somehow bewitched a vine to wrap around his head and cover his ears. The only one who wasn't awake was Axel, and even he was snoring loud enough to be heard through his door. So with all this noise, the Superior casually left his room, passed the rooms of tiny tantrums, opened Saix's door and calmly asked the bafoons why they were so incompetent as to let the entire troop of young nobodies make enough noise so that he personally had to see to the problem.

Luckily, it was Zexion who explained the problem.

"Our apologies, Superior, but it seems that number 7 has taken to howling at an imaginary moon. We have ruled out every possible childish problem and used every means to cease this unusual behavior."

Xemnas rolled his eyes at their incompetence, stood over the howling hairball, and promptly slapped him. Saix stopped howling immediately and looked up at Xemnas. He stared for a second and then lifted his arms, asking to be picked up. The Superior lifted an eyebrow momentarily, but he eventually leaned down and scooped the baby up into his arms. The entire room was focused, with awe, on the cranky child that was now nuzzling their Superior's neck. Xemnas settled Saix more comfortably and glared at the others, stalking out of the door.

From then on, every full moon Saix was in Xemnas' care. And as the baby grew into a man, more rapidly then normal human development for some reason, more of his time was spent with Xemnas. Until eventually the Superior was quieting howls of a different kind.

Yeah! What'd you think? Review please! It makes me happy and actually post stuff. So people on the other site really liked the universe where all of the neophytes were babies, so I'm writing a chapter for each baby and the pairing they turn into. The next 2 chapters are Zexion/Demyx and a bit of Xig/Lux. There's also another XemSaix chap on the way.


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